How I Became a Beachbody Coach

Have you ever felt like you lost yourself completely? Or that your personality completely changed?  Have you ever felt like your best years were behind you? Or settled for mediocrity?  

"Who am I?" "What's my purpose?" "What am I supposed to be doing with my life?"  These are phrases commonly associated with adolescence, the struggle of high school, or even the endless possibilities of college.  

But these were questions I was asking myself in my late 20's, happily married to a professional baseball player, new mom to the most beautiful daughter in the world, seemingly living my dream life.  What was wrong with me?  

At the time, I just assumed I had changed.  I assumed my personality had changed.  I delighted in my role as a wife and mother, but accepted that there was nothing outside of that for me.  Any dreams or passions I use to have were gone. 

Here's the thing, contrary to many people's experiences, high school and college were some of the best years of my life.  I was a straight-A student, All-American athlete at the University of Florida, involved in community service and church, and I was surrounded by my best friends all the time.  

I knew exactly who I was and where I was going.  I had a very clear sense of purpose and direction.  My confidence was at a high, some may say it was too high!  : )  I was competitive and passionate, I was disciplined and fun.  I felt like I was living up to all God intended me to be.  

And then I graduated college, worked as a personal trainer for a year, married my husband, and we did baseball life.  We traveled around the country, met incredible friends, and experienced unforgettable moments together.  

But I wasn't DOING anything, and slowly, without being aware, I started changing in to a person I didn't recognize.  I had become lazy and unmotivated.  I was complacent.  I was boring. 

This slow descent started in early 2009, and lasted until January 2014, two months after giving birth to my twin boys.  All the years before, I had been able to ignore the longing to do more, the desire to be more, but neck-deep in diapers, and bottles, and toys, and breast pumps, and sleepless nights, I was desperate for something that was all my own. 

 Fitness had always been important to me, but with 3 children, 2 years old and under, I knew I wouldn't make it to the gym anymore.  I had heard about Beachbody's fitness programs and the coaching opportunity in the past, but had never been interested.  Finally, I decided I should try an at-home program, and if I was going to do it, I might as well become a coach and see if others wanted to do it with me.

  

I had zero expectations and a ton of doubt, but almost immediately, I began to change.  I felt my "old" self start to emerge.  By investing 30 minutes in to myself through fitness, and sharing my journey with others, I became empowered.  I felt passionate and competitive.  By practicing self-discipline in this one area, I found discipline in other areas of my life, as well.  

In short, becoming a Beachbody coach has changed me from the inside-out.  My Beachbody transformation is so much more than physical, it's emotional and spiritual, as well.  I thought God was done using me outside of my family.  I thought I didn't have any influence anymore.  I thought my fun, confident, inspiring years were behind me.  

I was wrong.  So wrong.  I feel more like the wife, mother, and woman God created me to be than I ever have.  I know with certainty I am doing what He has called me to do.  And the best part?  I am having a blast doing it.  

If you are looking for a purpose, for companionship, for confidence, or for your calling to help people, please contact me. I can't wait to help you get started!

Plastic Potties and Peanut Butter M&Ms: How I Potty Trained My Twin Two-Year-Old Boys

*** This entire article is based on my opinion and experience ONLY.  I am not an expert of any kind, so if you have any concerns about my method, you should ask your pediatrician, counselor, or child’s teacher.  You are more than welcome to kindly disagree ***

If I was going to attempt potty training my 2-year-old twin boys (they will be 2 ½ on April 28^th) before my fourth baby arrived (May 24), it was now or never.  So I spent the bulk of last week hunkered down inside our house armed with plastic potties and Peanut Butter M&Ms.

It was not something I was looking forward to, but I told myself I would give it three, absolutely consistent, dedicated days, and if they weren’t making significant progress, we would put those potties away for the next six months at least. 

Last Tuesday morning, the diapers came off and the potties came out, along with the towels and sanitary spray.  To be honest, there was a part of me that hoped they would NOT get it.  Potty training and its maintenance is quite a commitment, and I wasn’t sure I was ready.  But they absolutely surprised me and rocked it.

By day three (Thursday) there was no denying that they were getting it.  They only had one accident each and in both instances, they were headed to the potty.  On day six, we went to church diaper-less and accident-free. 

As a mom, there is no greater miracle than potty-training your child.  Nothing will make you feel more like superwoman than successfully teaching your child how to use the toilet.  I am so terribly proud of my sweet boys and their willingness to learn and I have to admit I am a little proud of me too : )

As I look back over the last week, I realize that everything I did with the boys is almost exactly what I did with Sienna when she was potty trained at only 21 months old.  I am assuming I did a few things right, so I wanted to write down my experience in hopes that it will help others. 

In the next few paragraphs I am going to explain exactly what I did, and why I did it.  I will also list key take-a-ways and give you a current update on where we stand, including the things that still aren’t perfect!

My Method and Best Tips

The first three days are nearly identical.  I feed them a nutritious breakfast of oatmeal and then I let them eat all the salty snacks they want, so they will drink a lot, and therefore pee a lot.  I also give them apple juice (which they never get).  The goal is to give them multiple opportunities to “practice” going potty.  I want them to pee more than they normally would, so they can’t just hold it for hours. 

I close the doors to the bedrooms and try to confine them to our living room and play area.  I keep the plastic potties where we are, so they are visible and easily accessible. 

I do not ask them to sit on the potty at regular intervals.  I prefer to catch them in the act, grab them, place them on the potty, and let them finish (hopefully) in the potty.   If I can tell that they have to go potty, I will beg or bribe them to sit and then I might read to them, let them see my phone, and entertain them however I can until they go. 

I will encourage them to sit on their potties while they are watching TV or I am reading them a book.  Often this will lead to them eventually going in the potty. 

I celebrate every drop in the potty.  Even if they start on the floor and only get a few drops in the toilet, I celebrate big and give them a treat.  Oh, and my boys LOVED carrying the plastic potty insert to the real toilet, dumping it in, and flushing it.  This was a huge deal to them!

When they have accidents, I do not criticize or make them feel bad in any way.  I usually say something like, “Uh-oh!  Pee-pee goes in the potty silly boy!”  Any correction is very light-hearted, smiley, and friendly!

I diaper them for their afternoon nap and bedtime, but no other time. 

I prefer to keep them naked, but sometimes the boys wore undies if they wanted to.  I think there are advantages and disadvantages to children both being naked and wearing underwear.

When they are naked, you can more easily catch them in the act.  Also, I believe that sometimes undies can give children the impression that something is there to “catch” their pee or poop.  When they are naked, there is nowhere else for it to go. 

One advantage to undies is when a child has an “accident”, they can FEEL it, and may find it uncomfortable which is a good thing.  Some children enjoy picking out their own undies and don’t want to “mess” them up.  Having twins, I wasn’t always able to catch them in the act, so undies allowed me to see who made the mess. 

I remember with Sienna, at the end of day two I wanted to quit.  I felt she had regressed, it wasn’t working and I was ready to throw in the towel.  I felt very similarly with the boys, except now I knew, this was normal, and I needed to stick with it for day three.  Don’t give up after day two!

Unless they are REALLY not getting it, by day three, I do not purposely feed them salty snacks and drinks.  I go back to our normal eating/drinking routine. 

On day four, I move the plastic potties in to the bathroom, so the boys have to be conscious about giving themselves enough time to walk to the bathroom.

On day five, I put undies on them consistently and put the plastic potties away, encouraging them to use the real toilet either with or without the insert. 

I have heard that placing them on the toilet backwards is great because it minimizes the mess.  We did that a few times, but I also have taught them to sit far back on the toilet and lean forward, which also is very effective!

On day six, I took away the insert and we headed out of the house, in public, to church, for the first time.  I walked them in to their class and showed them the potty and reminded them to tell their teacher if they needed to go.  They did not use the potty, but they also did not have an accident.  After leaving their class, I took them to the potty, where I bribed them with a mint, and they both sat and went. 

Update

Today is day eleven and they are doing so well.  We’ve been to restaurants and the zoo with no accidents!  But when they are out in public, it has been more difficult to get them to try going.  I usually have to bribe them with a mint or candy or treat just to sit on the potty.  But it works and usually they do have to go.

What About #2?

Maddox is pooping in the potty consistently.  Price is not.  Price either goes in his diaper at nap or nighttime, or very unfortunately (and luckily rarely) goes in his undies.  That is NOT a fun clean-up : )  I haven’t done anything different with Maddox than Price, so I am just going to let this run its course and hope Price catches on!

Other Issues

On the other hand, Maddox will not go at school with his teachers.  I am wondering if it has less to do with school, and more to do with the fact that I am not there.  So I am going to be more intentional about having other people take him to the potty instead of me, so he will become more comfortable.

What About Naps and Nighttime? 

I don’t know when I will take away the diapers for naps and nighttime.  With Sienna, that was a slow process and I didn’t even consider it until she had consistently awakened dry.  To me, this is minor, did not cause confusion and never affected her daytime progress. 

How Do You Know If Your Child Is Ready?

Honestly, I don’t know how to tell if a child is ready or not.  I know there are readiness factors you should certainly take in to consideration (read more about that here), but when I trained my daughter at 21 months, she wasn’t “ready” at all according to the charts.

I also attempted potty training my sons six months ago, and it didn’t work.  So I tried again six months later, and they picked it up in three days.  In my opinion, if they aren’t significantly making progress after three days, they probably aren’t ready, and you should wait a few months and then try again. 

That being said, I don’t think it hurts to try early.  I feel like waiting too long gives children the opportunity to become headstrong and even develop unrealistic fears about it.  I like to at least try when they are still sweet, enjoy pleasing mom and dad, and don’t know any better!

Summary

-       **Keep the small plastic potties accessible and visible.

-       **Reward and celebrate every “hit”.

-       **Don’t leave the house for at least three days.

-       **Feed them salty snacks and lots of drinks, to give them many opportunities to practice.

-       **Naked or undies: it’s up to you!  You may need to experiment and see how your child responds best.

-       **Don’t give up after day two!

-       **After three days, you can start making small progressions like putting undies on, moving the plastic potties in to the bathroom, taking away the plastic potties, and even venturing out of the house.

-       **Always keep small mints or candies (that won’t melt) around so you can bribe and reward your child when appropriate.

      

      Thoughts?

I would love to hear from you and what has worked for you!  What did you do similarly to me?  What did you do differently? 

Any tips for me regarding Maddox's unwillingness to go at school and Price's unwillingness to go #2?

And like I said, I am no expert, but if you have any questions, I will absolutely do my best to answer them.  Feel free to comment below!

How I Learned to Dream Again

"Dreams are the power of God.  It's His thoughts when we lack thoughts, hope when we lack hope, and his reality overriding our seemingly impossible path." Havilah Cunnington

Even when I wasn't dreaming, God was dreaming for me.  Even when I was not making plans, God already had His plans laid out.  Even when I felt purposeless, God had a purpose.  Even when I felt invisible, God saw me.  Even when I felt worthless, He called me beautiful. 

As I sit here now, full of hope and ambition and life, I am amazed at what God has done.  There was this time when I thought God was pretty much done with me.  I had lived my highlight reel in high school and college.  I had done my part, and now it was time to sit back and watch everyone else's dreams unfold.

Though I couldn't have been more wrong, I was definitely lost.  I had someone become stuck.  I was the kind of girl who always knew what was coming next, I set goals, and never doubted who I was.  But year after stagnant year, I lost track of myself and God's vision for my life.  I became complacent, content with mediocrity, okay with sitting the bench.  

Finally, I began to wake up.  Something in me started stirring because honestly, I was bored.    I was living a nomadic baseball life with a sweet one and a half year old little girl.  She napped like clockwork, which is when I would spend way too much time watching television.  Boredom forced me to consider my options, but not yet take action.  

Eleven months later, I was not bored anymore.  With a two year old daughter and newborn twin sons, boredom was not an issue.  But I was still drowning.  I became desperate to do more, to be more.  I needed to feel more like ME and less like a zombie milk machine.  And so I did something I told myself I would never do.  I joined a network marketing company called Beachbody and my life has never been the same.  

This story isn't about Beachbody, it's about God's faithfulness.  It's about the way He didn't give up on me, even when I had given up.  He was patient when I was stubborn.  He waited on me until I was ready.  He oh so gently continued to move in me and speak to me and show me the way, even when I didn't want to see it.  He continued to dream for me and about me, just waiting for me to join Him.  Now, we dream together.  

Sweet friends, you have not already lived your highlight reel.  You have better things, the best things even, yet to come.  God is not done with you yet.  He has not demoted you to second string.  He is still dreaming for you and about you with big plans yet to fulfill.  He's always inviting you to join Him.  

Pray about God's dreams for your life.  Pay attention to the opportunities, people, and ideas that keep coming up and won't seem to go away despite your best efforts to make them.  Read a book that will encourage you and challenge you to pursue God's dreams for your life.  Surround yourself with doers and dreamers.  

Start dreaming with God again. 

Books I recommend: 

"Eat Pray Hustle" Havilah Cunnington

"Life Unstuck" Pat Layton

"Restless" Jennie Allen

"You Were Made For a God-Sized Dream" Holley Gerth

How To Be Better

"How are you feeling?"

29 weeks in to this pregnancy, I have been asked this question a lot.  My most recent response  has been...

"I feel great right now, but ask me again once this baby...baby NUMBER FOUR is actually born."  

The truth is, it's been the kind of week where I wonder how we are going to do it.  How will I properly attend to this precious newborn baby's needs while simultaneously fulfilling the very real needs of my 2 year old twin sons and my 4 year old daughter?  

This week, it's been scary to think about.  I have felt inadequate and unprepared for the huge adventure ahead.  This week I have struggled to train and love and discipline and nurture the three children I have.  It's been a tough week...the kind of week where you give yourself credit for surviving at all.

But it's also been the kind of week where you realize you need to re-evaluate and decide to become better.  It's the kind of week that motivates you to stop worrying and start praying.  It's the kind of week that makes you want to be the woman God created you to be, not the one you currently are.  

I am going to be more intentional...more intentional in my prayer life, more intentional in my marriage, more intentional in my parenting.  How? 

1. I was recently hit by Peter Haas' quote, "if you're praying more for circumstantial things than for character, you're out of sync with God."  Guilty.  So I am going to start praying for God to make me in to the mother and wife He wants me to be. I am going to start praying for my children more specifically.  I am going to start praying for my marriage more purposefully.  

2. Matt and I have been busy.  We've been overwhelmed.  We've been stressed.  This has allowed for some dissension to enter our relationship.  We haven't been connected the way we should be.  There is no room for space between us when this baby comes.  We need to be on the same page, with the same vision, and clear expectations. We need to be one.  It's time for Matt and I to carve our more one-on-one time for each other.  And he agrees.  

3. I have struggled to be intentional in my parenting.  I wake up with the right attitude, a beautiful plan for our day, and by 8:17am, I am already in survival mode.  Perhaps, I need to just be.  I need to rest in Jesus.  I need to be present.  I need to take the time to teach and discipline even when I don't feel like fighting my stubborn toddlers.  And I need to keep reading.  I need to invest in learning and growing as a mother because it turns out that incredible, Godly children usually don't happen by accident.  They happen because of intentionality, purposefulness, and a lot of prayer.  

So while I feel overwhelmed, doubtful, and scared, I also have a renewed sense of hope and peace and excitement.  Why?  Because I have a God who is far bigger than my doubts and fears.  I have a God who allows us to grow and CAN make me better.  I don't have to be stuck the way I am.  I have potential!  And I might even be able to pull this 4 kids, 4 and under thing off thanks to the power and grace and kindness of God.    

So what are you reading?  What books have made you better?  What habits have improved your life, your motherhood, your marriage?

I am freely taking prayers and suggestions! 

The Comeback

A friend of mine posted this sweet image with these encouraging words a few days ago, and on that day- a very rough-mom day- I struggled to believe it was true.

I had been far from the "best mom in the whole universe" and my daughter is beyond the age when she quickly forgets when mommy is mean or yells too much.  She remembers.  She hurts.  She looks at me with those huge blue eyes full of sadness, disappointment, and dare I admit it, even a little fear.

It was one hour out of our day; one hour in which I couldn't handle the complaining, the questions, the attitude, and least of all myself.

I yelled.
I apologized.
We had a heart to heart.
I asked for forgiveness.
And then just minutes later, I yelled again.

I literally didn't know where to go from there.  How could I have lost control of myself AGAIN?  What was my daughter going to think of me?  I wanted to escape.  I wanted to give up.  I wanted to quit.  I needed to stop being a mom in that moment.  And it's not because my children were being so awful.  It's because I was being so awful.  Clearly, I could not handle mommy-duties that day.  Clearly, I was not capable of listening, and teaching, and disciplining effectively.

But there was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, nowhere to escape.  These three sweet baby-faces were stuck with me as their mom that day, with no help in sight.

So I apologized again.
We had a heart to heart again.
I asked for forgiveness again.
And we went on a walk.

We moved on.  I pressed forward.  We tried again.  I forgave myself.  Because as moms, that's our only choice.  There usually isn't a fire exit or an emergency escape route. There are no sick-days.  And definitely no paid time-off.

That's the thing with motherhood.  It isn't something you do in your spare time.  It isn't a hobby.  It's day in and day out, 24/7.  It's when you feel like it and when you don't.  It's when you feel like supermom and when you are barely holding it together.

The truth is, I am far from able on my own.  But I am better with God.  I am sure I am not fit for the job, but God thinks differently.  Honestly, on that Tuesday afternoon, the only thing that kept me going (besides the fact that it wasn't nap-time yet), was the forgiveness and grace of God.  The promise of a fresh start, not just the next day, but the very next minute, a fresh start was waiting for me.  It was mine to take and rest in.  So I did.

Unfortunately, that won't be the last time I fail and it probably won't be the worst case of failure when it comes to my motherhood either.  But I think learning how to come back from those moments of failure is what's important.  How are we going to respond?  How are we going to treat our children, our spouse, ourselves the rest of the day?  Will we give in to the ugliness of our hearts or rest in the love and grace of Jesus?

He is on my side.  He believes in me.  He thinks I CAN do this.  He will equip me.  He will forgive me.  And He loves me.  Those truths are where my hope rests.

Picture-Perfect Marriage

It's no secret that I put myself out there on social media.  I am pretty open and vulnerable whether we are acquaintances, lifelong friends, or you've just come across a post on Facebook.  Honestly, I consider it a gift and a strength that God has given me.  I never thought I would share so much of myself on social media.  I realize it's not for everyone.  

Yes, I started posting more for my Beachbody business, but now I feel like it's part of my ministry.  Yep, that's right...I said that posting on Facebook is my MINISTRY.  Scary, huh?  What has the world come to?  Am I out of my mind?  Who do I think I am?  Do I really think God can use me through FACEBOOK?!  

Yes.I.do. 

Someone recently asked my husband if it bothered him the way I put myself (and him and our marriage) out there.  His response?  "Absolutely not.  I know where I stand in my marriage and with my wife.  I am confident enough in our relationship that what she posts comes as no surprise to me." 

Do you know what I love about Matt's response?  He too knows marriage is hard.  It's no secret.  What I post on social media is not surprising to him.  He knows our struggles because we talk about them...a LOT.  He knows our pressure points because we experience them together.  Anything I vaguely hint at on Facebook has already been talked out, communicated through, and worked out between Matt and I.  If I am vulnerable on Facebook, how much MORE vulnerable do you think I am with my husband?  

Don't get me wrong, I don't air our dirty laundry (nor do I intend to) and I rarely get in to specifics, but I have made no secret about the fact that marriage is hard.  Our marriage is hard.  Isn't all marriage hard?  

I would love to hide behind pictures of romantic date nights and adorable family photos, but that's not the whole truth, is it?  Again, I don't expect everyone to do what I do, but I feel called to make sure people understand that our marriage is not picture perfect.  

And that's what I love about my marriage.  I love that it's not perfect and more importantly, that Matt and I both realize it.  I love that if we were to list the specific struggles we have in our marriage, our lists would look very similar.  Our problems are not a mystery to us.  When we are getting off course, losing track of each other, bickering, we take the time to find the root.  We search each other's hearts and ask "What's really going on here?"

Are those conversations fun?  No.  Are they always done in a calm, patient, loving manner?  No.  Do we always find the answers right away?  No.  Does that mean that specific problem is solved forever?  No.  But the result of those many conversations throughout the weeks, months, and years is that we always get back on track, on course before it's too late. 

So when I post a vulnerable post about the sensitive topic of my marriage, don't doubt for one second that Matt doesn't know EXACTLY what I'm talking about.  He knows.  We've already been there.  We've already done that.  

So why post about that stuff at all?  I have to.  Like I said, I actually do feel called to.  I think talking about the difficult parts of marriage might make you feel normal.  I think it might inspire someone else.  Maybe it will challenge you.  I need you to know that we don't have it all together, but we are TRYING.  With God's help, infinite grace, and perfect example of sacrificial love, Matt and I will continue to strive toward a selfless, beautiful marriage...the kind of marriage Christ desires for us...the kind of marriage that our children will want to exemplify in their own relationships.  

So that's us...far from perfect, but always communicating, always working, never giving up. 

Survival vs Impact

On day one of my "Eat Pray Hustle" study by Havilah Cunnington, the question was...

"Do you believe God could use you to reach your world?"

One week ago, I journaled my response...

"I do believe God can use me to reach my world, but I don't think about it enough.  I don't consider it often.  Most days, it's hard to survive what's right in front of me, let alone think about my impact on the world."

Can anyone else relate to that?  The reality of it makes me laugh.  I am currently sitting at my kitchen table in yesterday's makeup, sending messages, blogging, all while a huge glob of oatmeal has been on my floor for the past three hours, thanks to this morning's breakfast.

Impact the world?  Me?  Can anyone else relate? : )

I can't even prioritize cleaning up oatmeal, let alone fit in to my schedule, "change the world today". 

BUT as I reviewed the study from this past week, I am realizing that impacting our world has much less to do with some grand plan, than some heroic action, than some life-changing decision.   

Impacting our world happens in the little moments.  It happens while I'm cleaning up oatmeal, checking in on a friend, cuddling a fussy toddler, making breakfast for my husband (because that doesn't happen very often anymore), or retrieving yet again just "ONE MORE" cup of water before my 4 year old will finally go to sleep.

Just yesterday at church, Pastor Matt Roden said something exactly in line with what I've been learning all week.  "Resting in God is not one more thing TO DO, but it's the WAY YOU DO everything you have to do."  I believe that's how we best impact the world.  We sit at the feet of Jesus WHILE doing everything we have to.  We live life slowly, eager to listen to the voice of God, even in the midst of errands and cooking and breaking up toddler fist-fights (does that only happen at my house?).  

Doesn't it sound easy?  ;)  It's not.  I'm quite sure of that.  As a matter of fact, I think it's a discipline.  It takes practice to consistently live in the presence of the Holy Spirit.  It takes commitment and sacrifice to choose rest and stillness over the distractions of life.  

We can all impact the world, one step at a time, one kind word at a time, one small decision to the next.