Hustle

“Hustle for JOY. Work just as hard for fun moments, vacation moments, and pee-your-pants laughing moments as you do for all the other things.” Rachel Hollis

This was our 4th Annual Valentine’s Weekend Couples Retreat (next year we’re getting shirts 😜). And this quote is exactly WHY we do it. We have eleven kids between us, husbands with full-time jobs, mamas with a side-biz, yet we WORK for this weekend. We set the time aside, we hire the childcare, we make it a priority.

Because our marriages need it. Our weary mama (and daddy) hearts need it. Our souls need it. We need to laugh and cry and talk and hug it out. We need to rest and play and eat chips and guac all day (like seriously, ALL.DAY.LONG.).

So hustle, yes. But make sure you hustle for the sweet stuff too.

Again

I talk a lot about keeping your priorities first and grace and work/life/family balance and self-love and rest hoping to encourage you. But I need you to know I am still in the trenches. 

This month has been full of worry over silly things, battling hard to keep those priorities #1, struggling to find rest and grace in the arms of Jesus, and I'm tired. Tired of striving.

The song, "Here Again", by Elevation Worship, speaks to my weary heart...

"I'm not enough unless you come
Will you meet me here again
'Cause all I want is who you are
Will you meet me here again"

I'm not enough. Unless you come. Will you meet me here AGAIN?

I love the AGAIN. Because how many times have I been here? How many times do I think I have it figured out, only to find myself a few months, weeks, days, even hours later, right back here...striving, trying, pushing?

So my prayer for ME today is (and maybe you need it too) is that I would pause and rest and remain in Him. That my eyes would be fixed on Him alone. That the joy of the Lord would be my strength.

Love you all. 

Still Learning

Them: I don’t know how you do it all.
Me: I don’t.

This is a conversation I have at least a few times a week. And I always tell the truth. I don’t do it all. I don’t think there has been one day since I had twins and started this business that I have done it all. Not one day has gone by that I thought, “Yep, I really NAILED it today.” 😂

And I am totally okay with that. I have learned to adjust (ahem, LOWER) my expectations for what I intend to get done on a daily, weekly, monthly, and even yearly basis.

I have learned that a good weekly brain dump (writing down every single thing that I think I need to do) helps immensely with clearing my head space, but that each item on that list will NOT get done (at least for that week) and will just be transferred to next week’s list, and maybe even the next week’s list after that.

And every morning I say a few of the exact same positive affirmations and prayers. Some are very positive and empowering. But my favorite ones go like this…

“I will not get everything done today, and that’s okay.”
“Lord, show me where to direct my energy. Show me who and what needs my attention today.”
“Let me be available and interruptible.”

I manage a lot, but I don’t do it all. I have days when I feel really satisfied and proud of myself and days when I know I totally blew it (in one area of life or another).

And either way, at the end of everyday, I’ve learned to be okay. I’ve learned to accept that I’m going to fail and fail a lot. I’ve learned that it’s okay to lower your expectations, but still dream big.

Embraced

Friends, this is kind of long, but I couldn’t cut any part of it out. This word from Lysa Terkeurst’s “Embraced” devotional really spoke to me today, so naturally I wanted to share with you. I pray it brings a spark of hope and encouragement.

“David was anointed to become King. But where did he go after being anointed as king? To a refining school? A government academy? Military training? Nope.

He went back to the fields and continued to shepherd his sheep. A king-to-be doing lowly tasks. A future king whose character was refined in the fields of everyday life to prepare him for his calling.

How like us. In the midst of smelly laundry, dirty dishes, snotty noses, misplaced keys, overdue library books, bills, and that birthday gift that still needs to be mailed- there is training. There is character building. There is soul defining. All of which must take place for us to become what God intends.

We aren’t just doing tasks. We are building a legacy. We are shaping God’s Kingdom. We are in the process of not only discovering our calling but that of our family as well.”

Parenting

Parenting is so hard (even with these doll-faces 😍). A few nights ago, it had been a really, really long day of parenting. Matt and I were JUST.SO.DONE.

And it wasn’t because they were all throwing thunderous tantrums or behaving badly. It was just the incessant needs, wants, questions, demands, drinks of water, snacks, over, and over, and over again.

I remember sitting down that night, trying to write something inspiring, but the truth was, I didn’t feel inspired. I felt exhausted. Tired.

But in the last few days, a book I read came to mind, called “The 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Transform Your Family”. I remember reading this part about how we get frustrated by the fact that our children continue to need PARENTING (like why don't they get it the first time? 😜).

We are frustrated that they are five years old and can’t tie their own shoes yet. We are frustrated that we have to continue to repeat ourselves. We are frustrated when they want us to read one more story. We are frustrated when they interrupt OUR agenda.

“We’re often mad at our children, not because they have broken God’s law, but because they have gotten in the way of the laws of our peace and comfort. And sadly, there are moments when we are mad that our children need us to walk down the hall and parent them once more.” Paul David Tripp

GUT.CHECK.

The truth is, parenting is my J O B. It is my greatest calling. And I don’t get to be frustrated because they are little and immature and dependent and need me to teach them over and over and over again. I don’t get to be angry that they sometimes interrupt my free time or wake me up earlier than I want.

So this is what I will working on over here. I need to save my discipline, my instruction for when they are breaking God’s law, not for when I am tired at the end of a long day, and they ask for another sip of water.

What I Learned

I fell short of a huge goal in my business this past year. For the first time in four years, I did not meet the requirements to be called an Elite coach.

And it is important to me to share this with you because you all have been so generous with me, so supportive, so receptive in allowing me to share my life, my business, and my family with you. And it’s so much fun to tell you the good stuff, but it doesn’t seem right if I don’t share some of the disappointments along the way. I feel like I owe that to you.

So what did I learn?

1. You have to track your goals consistently from the get-go. The title of Elite is a YEAR-LONG quest. I should have mapped it out, broken it down, and made sure I was meeting the standards back in January, instead of waiting until October to really start measuring my progress.

2. While I am disappointed, I am not devastated. My ego is bruised, but my confidence is not shaken. I am discontent with the outside results, but very much at peace within.

3. Even without the title of Elite, I am still as passionate and excited about my business as ever. Elite does not change my potential for income or growth or my ability to mentor my team and customers. I was worried the wind would be taken out of my sails by this failure, but instead it has burned a new fire within me…the fire of discipline and intention and belief.

4. Kisses from Tessa > Elite 😜

So thank you. Thank you for reading my posts and cheering me on along the way…for your prayers for my family and my business…for your likes and comments and messages.

I love being a part of this community and sharing the good (and sometimes the bad).

Take It Slow

“You can do anything, but not everything.” David Allen

I haven’t totally mastered this concept, but I am always trying. As a matter of fact, one of the affirmations I say on a daily basis goes like this…

“I will not get everything done today and that’s okay.”

This affirmation completely transforms the way I start my day and the way I go about my day.

From the get-go, I lower my expectations.
I give myself permission to fail.
I acknowledge that I will not cross off everything on my to-do list and that life will still go on.

As we begin a new year, the temptation to do EVERYTHING is going to sneak up. Don’t give in, friends!

Adjust your expectations.
Give yourself permission to fail.
Take it slow.
Enjoy the magic.