Even when I wasn't dreaming, God was dreaming for me. Even when I was not making plans, God already had His plans laid out. Even when I felt purposeless, God had a purpose. Even when I felt invisible, God saw me. Even when I felt worthless, He called me beautiful.
As I sit here now, full of hope and ambition and life, I am amazed at what God has done. There was this time when I thought God was pretty much done with me. I had lived my highlight reel in high school and college. I had done my part, and now it was time to sit back and watch everyone else's dreams unfold.
Though I couldn't have been more wrong, I was definitely lost. I had someone become stuck. I was the kind of girl who always knew what was coming next, I set goals, and never doubted who I was. But year after stagnant year, I lost track of myself and God's vision for my life. I became complacent, content with mediocrity, okay with sitting the bench.
Finally, I began to wake up. Something in me started stirring because honestly, I was bored. I was living a nomadic baseball life with a sweet one and a half year old little girl. She napped like clockwork, which is when I would spend way too much time watching television. Boredom forced me to consider my options, but not yet take action. Eleven months later, I was not bored anymore. With a two year old daughter and newborn twin sons, boredom was not an issue. But I was still drowning. I became desperate to do more, to be more. I needed to feel more like ME and less like a zombie milk machine. And so I did something I told myself I would never do. I joined a network marketing company called Beachbody and my life has never been the same.
This story isn't about Beachbody, it's about God's faithfulness. It's about the way He didn't give up on me, even when I had given up. He was patient when I was stubborn. He waited on me until I was ready. He oh so gently continued to move in me and speak to me and show me the way, even when I didn't want to see it. He continued to dream for me and about me, just waiting for me to join Him. Now, we dream together.
Sweet friends, you have not already lived your highlight reel. You have better things, the best things even, yet to come. God is not done with you yet. He has not demoted you to second string. He is still dreaming for you and about you with big plans yet to fulfill. He's always inviting you to join Him.
Pray about God's dreams for your life. Pay attention to the opportunities, people, and ideas that keep coming up and won't seem to go away despite your best efforts to make them. Read a book that will encourage you and challenge you to pursue God's dreams for your life. Surround yourself with doers and dreamers.
Start dreaming with God again.
Books I recommend:
"Eat Pray Hustle" Havilah Cunnington
"Life Unstuck" Pat Layton
"Restless" Jennie Allen
"You Were Made For a God-Sized Dream" Holley Gerth
Your writings are so open, so honest, so inspiring and encouraging....to everyone. God definitely speaks through you here! Thank you for always being a willing messenger! Keep going girl!
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