Ciao Bella

There are two pictures hanging in my house.  One hangs in my room, my then one-year old daughter, Sienna, expressing pure delight and joy. The other hangs in my living room and it is a photograph taken of "The Steps" in the piazza of Cortona, Italy.  

The second photograph is special for a few reasons.  One, it was a wedding gift.  Two, the photographer and gift-giver is Al Hurley.  My history with the Hurley family began the day I was born, they played a huge role in my life, and they are forever friends.  

The third reason is the location.  The steps of Cortona, Italy, are where I fell in love.  

When I was fifteen years old, my beloved Uncle Albert and Aunt Susan invited me to go to Italy with their family for three weeks.  Their excuse for inviting me?  So I could help watch the kids, of course.  The real reason?  They wanted to give me the gift of an unforgettable experience.  

In July of 1999, Uncle Albert, Aunt Susan, 77 year-old Great-Uncle Henry, 7 year-old Olivia, 3 year-old Albert Joseph, and I embarked on an Italian adventure.  As you can imagine, with such a wide variety of ages and people, the trip was far from perfect, but it remains one of the most extraordinary experiences of my life.  

You see, we didn't get to Italy, and then spend 2 nights in 12 cities.  We arrived in Cortona at the most charming, exquisite, rustic, Tuscan farmhouse you could possibly imagine.  We unpacked, we settled in, and we made it our home for the next three weeks.  

Our first meal was prepared by a radiant Italian woman.  I was tasting flavors and eating dishes I never knew existed before.  Nearly every night, we ate beneath a grape-vine entwined trellis on a stone table that had been in that exact spot for who knows how long.  It was culture shock of the best variety.  

Almost everyday I walked in to the town of Cortona, feeling as independent as I've ever felt.  I would sit on the steps in the center of the piazza watching the people of this small town, listening to their unfamiliar chatter, and basking in the wonder of it all.  

We would take day trips to places with beautiful names like Monticello, Montepulciano, Parma, and Siena (yes, that's where "Sienna"s name comes from), but always coming back to our Cortona.  

As I write this so many images are flooding my mind, but I am struggling to find the words.  My simple writing can not do my memories justice.  

On one of our last evenings, Uncle Albert and I took the now-familiar path in to town.  We sat on the on the steps of the piazza, had a glass of wine (even me), and talked and laughed and watched and learned.  

At the end of three weeks, I was devastated to leave.  Cortona felt like home.  I felt the town had adopted me as one of their own.  As the car pulled away from the stone walls, I cried, but I vowed to come back. 

I had fallen in love.  I fell in love with Italy.  I fell in love with Italian food.  I fell in love with gelato.  I fell in love with Cortona.  I fell in love with lavender.  I fell in love with piazzas, and I fell in love with those steps...the steps that made me less ignorant, less naive, and more curious, more passionate.  

I've been back twice, gratefully, but I hunger for more.  Every once in a while, I have this overwhelming desire to just pick up and go...this feeling that I NEED to go...this urge to be there in my special place on the steps of the piazza...this overwhelming rush to slow down and experience life, culture, adventure, life-changing food...to stop and smell the lavender.  

Until then...Ciao, Bella. 

Dream House Nightmares

In January, Matt and I had our first meeting with our architect to start planning and designing our dream home.  We are in love with our piece of property, so our hope is that in 2016, we will be able to knock down our current house and rebuild.  

Doesn't it sound like fun?

But eight months later we have gone around in circles until we ended back at square one.  The problem isn't that we don't know what we want, the problem is that we EACH know EXACTLY what we want...and our visions are worlds apart.  

I would be blissfully happy in a craftsman style bungalow complete with tons of charm, character, and quaintness.  

Matt, on the other hand, would be on cloud 9 if I would only assent to the ultra-modern, stainless steel bachelor pad that he wants. 

What does a marriage of those two visions look like?  Beats me. And our poor, sweet, patient architect...I feel like we've sent her on a wild goose chase trying to capture each of our idyllic images for our dream house.  

Two days ago, I couldn't even sleep because my mind wouldn't stop turning.  I felt discouraged and hopeless.  I didn't see how we would ever find a style of house we both could truly love. 

And that's the thing, the truth is, I don't want Matt to just say, "Fine, do whatever you want, Dara."  I REALLY don't.  My greatest desire is that we find a perfect compromise.  But I don't want either of us to feel like we are settling.  There's a difference.  

After being emotional and distraught for two days over this, I finally came to my senses (I'm just sorry it took so long).  This is not a problem.  Yes, it's a large investment.  Yes, it's our forever house.  Yes, we should be thoughtful and attentive.  But this is not a problem.  

Last night it was so clear how blessed I am to have a "problem" like this.  Matt and I have the opportunity to plan, design, customize, and hopefully actually build the house of our dreams!  How could I have lost sight of that?  How could I have let the natural frustrations of this process overwhelm the spirit of humility and gratitude I SHOULD have? 

I am excited to move forward and determined to handle the "problems" this project dishes out with grace and gratitude.  I will not neglect to remember that it's far better for me to store up treasure in heaven instead of here on earth.

Operation: Fun Dara

I have become boring.  It's sad, terribly sad, but true.  

And it's hard to admit, but you guys know my blog is where I work my issues out and lay them out for the world to see!

I discovered this shocking revelation just the other night.  I couldn't shake this sense of discontentment, this feeling of being bored, this concept that my days, my weeks, my months are the same.  Monotony was boring me to tears.  

Naturally, I looked around me for something or someone to blame, but sadly, I realized it was me.  I.am.boring.

You might be shaking your head, claiming that I'm being too hard on myself.  You might even think I'm tons of fun.  But I'm not...just ask my husband.  Ouch.  That was even harder to admit. 

You see, even on our date nights, which we do regularly and I genuinely look forward to, by 9 o'clock my eyes are glazing over as I try to follow what exactly it is he is saying.  

After the kids go to bed, I am rarely, if ever, in the mood to discuss the things we need to discuss...easy, little things like what to do for Sienna's birthday.  But I am so apparently exhausted, that I refuse to engage him in conversation about trivial matters, let alone deeper or more intimate topics.  

Now, I know what you're thinking again.  I have a ball of boundless energy in my almost-four year old, Sienna, and two destructive tornadoes in the form of my 21 month old twins, Price and Maddox.  Of course I'm exhausted.  I am smack dab in the middle of one of the most challenging seasons in parenthood...the toddler stage...and I have three.  

And now you're remembering this relatively successful fitness business I run from home, and you are desperately trying to make me feel better about myself, patting me on the back, and saying, "It's okay that you are so drained.  Anyone in your position would be."

And maybe you're right.  But I don't think my marriage should take the fall.  I don't think Matt should receive the short end of the stick at the end of everyday.  I don't think this "tough season" is a good enough excuse to justify my boring behavior.  

In fairness, it's not just Matt who has been deprived of my former magnetic personality.  The thought of leaving my house after 8pm for a girls' night is often the LAST thing I want to do.  And scheduling play dates remains elusive due to my boys' nap schedule.  

So instead of waiting for the children to grow up and for this season to pass, I am going to create the spark I've been missing.  I have decided to be fun again.  I am going to loosen the reigns on my schedule and drink some coffee in the evening if I must.  I am going to put girls' nights on the calendar and meet Matt for surprise lunch dates.  

Doesn't it sound fun?  Don't I sound fun?  

I'll keep you updated on Operation: Fun Dara.  Stay tuned! 

    

The Hardest Job in the World

Being a mom is hard.  It's draining.  It's exhausting.  Someone always needs something.  There are constantly hands grabbing you, reaching for you.  "Mama" rings constantly in your ears.  Diapers are never-ending.  And feeding them?  Don't get me started.  

Some days feel like an eternity...heck, the two hours leading up to bed time can feel like an eternity.  I've never been so physically worn out and emotionally drained as when I have a day at home with all three kids by myself.  Seriously.  Never.  Not as a Division I college athlete, not as the wife of a major league baseball player, and not even the summer I competed in a fitness competition.  

Tantrums and attitudes, bribery and negotiations, and whining...lots and lots of whining fill my days.  Sometimes I could just scream.  And sometimes, unfortunately, I do.  Sometimes I just want to quit.  But that of course is not an option (also unfortunate).  There are moments when I am POSITIVE that if I have to pick up one more cheerio off the ground, I'll officially lose it.  

And then Price will toddle over with his bow-legged, pigeon-toed gait, and crawl in to my lap, book in hand.  

Or Sienna, out of the blue, and unprompted, will quietly utter, "I love you, Mama."

Or Maddox will spontaneously give Price a huge hug and kiss.  

One perfect moment in the midst of seemingly never-ending imperfect moments...makes it all okay.  One hug, one act of sibling affection, one mischievous grin brings everything back in to perspective.  

In those perfect moments I could nearly cry because of God's grace.  

In those moments when I allow myself to sit back and just take it all in, I am overwhelmed with gratitude that these are MY babies.  I get to keep them?!  I can hardly believe it.  

In those sacred 10 seconds before everything goes back to chaos, I think of the women who struggle with infertility or the mamas who have lost a child, and I can hardly breathe.

So when Price is playing in the toilet, and when Maddox has poop on his fingers, and Sienna hasn't stopped talking for three hours straight...I hope to be able to take a deep breath, and quietly say:

"I am the luckiest girl in the world.  I can't BELIEVE I get to raise these beautiful, brilliant children and love on them all day, everyday."

Confessions of a Girl Who Loves To Eat

Beachbody coach or not, I struggle when it comes to consistently eating well.  I have compiled a list of 5 reasons that I struggle to maintain a healthy nutrition agenda.  

1. I am a girl with a big appetite.  

I've never understood those people who just forget to eat.  I am usually planning my lunch before I've even tasted my breakfast. 

In middle school, I used to bring the largest lunch of all my friends and was known (and gently teased) for finishing off what another kid couldn't eat.  

In high school, when I was challenged to eat a whole medium pizza (8 slices), I did.  

At a buffet, I am nearly always the first one to pop back up for seconds.  

When Matt and I split a meal, it's half and half (never mind the fact that he is nearly 100 pounds heavier than me)!  Poor Matt never gets to FINISH off my plate the way most men get to enjoy the leftovers of their wives' meals. 

Let me put it this way...I have literally had very real ideas of creating a spin-off of the show "Man vs Food".  I, of course, would call it "Little Girl vs Food"...because who wouldn't tune in to watch a petite, muscular, seemingly lady-like gal CRUSH some food? I would watch that. And that just goes to show how big my appetite really is.

I love to eat and I can EAT.A.LOT.

2. Cheeseburgers are my favorite food.

Why is this a problem?  Because I know other women with big appetites, but it seems a few of them actually prefer to fill themselves up with salmon and broccoli and salad and quinoa.  

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy healthy food...but not as much as I enjoy a HUGE, greasy, bacon cheeseburger (with fries of course).  OR a large pizza with extra cheese.  (Is anyone else hungry yet?)

When people ask me what my favorite kind of food is...the answer is easy.  Bar food.  Literally, the kind of food you find in a sports bar is my favorite food.  Could I choose a worst genre of food?  (Do foods have genres?)

3. I am very content with how I look and am sitting at my ideal body weight/size.

Again, why is this a problem?  Because I'm not motivated.  I am one of those lucky ones that can get by with a little unhealthy eating and maintain their weight and physique.  

So if I can maintain my weight even when I make poor food choices, why would I be motivated to choose the grilled chicken and veggies over the steak and baked potato?

I am working on capturing the idea that my food choices should not be based on how I look, but on my overall health.  And I'm trying...I really am!  But I'm not totally there yet.  

4. I, too, fall prey to emotional eating. 

When I am stressed and overwhelmed...these are the feelings that drive me to eat.  In those moments, carrot sticks and hummus don't cut it.  I want the chips and queso.  I want the pint of Ben and Jerry's Half Baked (the best flavor) ice cream!  

After a long morning of being a mom, feeding the kids lunch, entertaining them outside, and FINALLY getting them down for a nap...the ONLY thing I want to do is curl up on the couch, watch the Bachelorette, and snack on something unhealthy.  Like I said...these are my "confessions".  

5. I am not an excellent or creative cook.

It's really not my idea of fun to admit publicly that I am not that great of a cook : )  I am getting better, but man, I just don't enjoy it that much.  It overwhelms me to look through recipes, find a healthy meal, put in the time, and then HOPE it turns out delicious, or at least edible enough that your two year old twins don't spit it out and throw it on the floor.  Is that so much to ask for?  

Cooking just doesn't come naturally to me.  At this point, I am unable to look through my cupboards and refrigerator and just WHIP something up with the ingredients that I have.  My mind doesn't work that way.  So every meal takes a lot of planning and preparation, and frankly, I find it exhausting.  

So now you know.  I struggle.  I am far from perfect when it comes to eating 100% clean, balanced, well-portioned meals all the time.  But I am working on it.  I am striving to be better.  I am slowly changing my mindset and perspective on food and what it means to me.  

So stay tuned for updates and my tips and tricks for eating healthy...even when you are a "girl who loves to eat"!  

P90X3 Favorites: Releve Plie Squats

Back to My First Love...P90X3

I mentioned recently that I had been in a workout rut.  I was bored, unmotivated, and weary. After hopping around from program to program, I decided to take it back to my first Beachbody love, P90X3.  

Tony Horton's P90X3 is intense and challenging.  This program will not only lean you out, but they will make you more athletic.  You will be more dynamic.  You will be able to do things you have never done before.  

When my twin boys were two months old and my daughter was just over two years old, I joined my first accountability group and relied on P90X3 and Shakeology to mold me back in to the body I knew before I was pregnant with twins.  I relied on this exercise program to give me back control over my body when I felt like I had zero control over anything else.  

Tony Horton made me feel like "ME" again.  He made me feel like I was more than just a nursing milk machine mama.  He gave me back my confidence and my six-pack.  He reminded me that I used to be athletic and competitive...and that I still am!  He trained me in a way I've never been trained before using resistance training, cardio, yoga, agility drills, kickboxing, yoga and balance skills.  

P90X3 is the whole package.  I can't wait to review each workout here on my blog and dive in deeper to what make P90X3 so special to me.  After all, you never forget your first love.

Cease Striving

"Cease striving and know that I am God."  Psalm 46:10 NASB
"Be still and know that I am God!" Psalm 46:10 NLT
"Step out of the traffic!  Take a long, loving look at me, your High God!" Psalm 46:10 MSG

This verse has appeared over and over to me in the last few weeks.  It has shown up in two different books, been discussed in Bible studies, and frankly, I just can't get it out of my head.  I may not always hear God's voice, I may not always be able to discern the voice of the Holy Spirit, but I can be quite confident that God is trying to say something to me.  

Through reading Jeannie Cunnion's, Parenting the Wholehearted Child and Pat Layton's Life Unstuck, through self-examination and reflection, I have discovered something about myself...

I seek approval through performance.  I am a performance-driven maniac.  I base my self worth on completing my to-do list, how well behaved my children are, how often I am intimate with my husband, how much money I make, on whether or not I've lost my temper that day, on hitting goals in my business, and if I was able to put a healthy dinner on the table that night.  

Are you exhausted?  I am.  I truly had no idea how much of what I thought about myself was based on these scenarios, these behaviors.  What happened to grace?  What happened to just being me?  What happened to owning my strengths and ADMITTING my failures? 

In high school, it was even worst if you can imagine.  I remember sobbing after every track meet if I did not live up to the standards I had set for myself and the ones I IMAGINED my coaches, family, and friends had set for me.  And when I say "sobbing", I do mean "sobbing".  

In one particular instance, one I can not look back on without cringing, I had just WON the state championship for pole-vaulting.  I was a junior in high school, and I had won my first state championship, yet I was balling because I had not reached the height I had hoped for.  A reporter was trying to interview me and I could hardly speak through my tears, and what I did manage to say was how disappointed I was in myself.  

Seriously?!  How ungrateful I was!  How immature!  How embarrassing!  The following day when the article came out, I cried again, but this time I was crying because I realized how ridiculous I had been and I was ashamed.  

After that, I think I slowly began to accept God's grace and also awoke to the realization that my friends, family, coaches, and God did not love me any less or any more based on how I pole-vaulted.  For three years, I had bought in to that lie.  

Though I don't pole-vault anymore, there is plenty more to STRIVE for, isn't there?  There are a plethora of ways to prove how great, disciplined, and successful you are.  

Jeannie Cannon says of herself, "It was easier to think of being saved by grace than it was to think of being accepted by grace...On most days I acted like Jesus' final three words on the cross were, 'Make me proud', instead of 'It is finished'."

I never could have articulated what Jeannie did in that above quote, but when I read it, I realized I may as well have wrote it.  That is me.  

I try so hard.  I think and strategize and read and do.  When will I just BE? 

"God doesn't want something from us.  He simply wants us." C.S. Lewis

St. Augustine said, "You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you."

I am ready to rest.  I am ready to BE with God.  I am ready to "cease striving" and know that He is God.  I am relieved to receive His Grace.  

P90X3 Favorites: Flip Flop Crunch

No Magic Pill

It has been heavy on my heart to share this...

Beachbody is not a quick fix.  

Shakeology is not a magic pill.  

I love health and fitness.  I am passionate about health and fitness.  I get so much fulfillment out of showing others what their bodies are capable of, guiding them in their goal-setting and creating a new mindset regarding who they are and what they can do.  

I was a Division I All-American pole-vaulter.  I interned at the Olympic Training Center in the strength and conditioning department.  I was a personal trainer.  

I know what being healthy looks like and I know that there are many different and GREAT ways to achieve your health and fitness goals.  

Beachbody is my method of choice.  Beachbody is the avenue that works BEST for me to reach others, share my experiences, and help them get where they want to go.  Choosing Beachbody has allowed me to make the biggest impact, and not just with my customers, but in my most important role...as a wife and mother to three precious little people.  

I believe in Beachbody as a company, and I believe in their products.  I don't have to be an expert because the people at Beachbody are.  The trainers and creators of Shakeology are brilliant and they know their stuff.  I am proud to be a Beachbody coach and I stand behind their products.  

That being said, I would be silly to try and convince you that Beachbody programs or Shakeology is the ONLY way to get healthy.  Of course not!  I love working out at the gym and I've been dying to try cross-fit!  But in the last 18 months, getting out of the house is a luxury, so my at-home programs have been my go-to!  

I love the quality that Shakeology offers.  I love that I can give it to my kids, and not worry about what ingredients are REALLY in it!  But that doesn't mean it's the ONLY quality shake on the market, it's just the one I've chosen, one my family enjoys, and the one that worked for me.  

The bottom line is this...to reach your health and fitness goals, you have to work hard.  You have to KNOW where you want to go and WHY you want to be there.  You have to be consistent.  You have to make sacrifices, and you have to be disciplined.  Any program or company or product that tells you differently is probably wrong.   

There are so many wonderful ways to get healthy.  There are so many incredible options.  You have to find what is going to work for you right NOW.  You have to find the best way for you to stay consistent and keep you motivated.  And I hope you do.  

As for me, I will continue to use Beachbody as my platform to support others through their health and fitness journey.  

Childbirth In All It's Glory

Is it me or is everyone you know having a baby or due with one any minute?!  With babies being born or about to be born everywhere I turn, I am vividly reminded of having my first baby, Sienna Rose.  

It was five days before my due date in Cleveland, OH, and I knew I was in labor, but the contractions were inconsistent and slow, so Matt, my parents, and my mother-in-law, Cindy, decided we were hungry, so at about 6:30 PM I consumed half a cheeseburger and fries.

Meanwhile, my contractions had suddenly become stronger, so in the midst of eating,  I periodically had to step outside of the restaurant, so I could be alone and experience the contractions without 50 pairs of eyes on me.  And yes, our waitress was mildly freaked out.

Upon returning home, I still wanted to wait it out because I refused to be the girl who shows up to the hospital TOO EARLY.  I texted my friend and she said I should go to the hospital when I could no longer talk during a contraction.  Oh.  I hadn't been able to talk during my contractions for the last hour or so! 



Off to the hospital we went, and in the front seat, I was literally writhing in pain and during the check-in process, I was hardly able to give the nurses the information we needed.  Finally, at 8:45, I was in my room, and they were going to see how dilated I was.  I was certain that i must be 7-8 centimeters.  4.5 centimeters.  I was angry.  I wanted to have a natural water birth with no epidural, but at this point I was seriously doubting my ability to do that.  If I was in this much pain at only 4.5 centimeters, there was NO way I could last another 6 hours.  

I was discouraged, defeated, and experiencing pain like I've never experienced it before.  My contractions did not come in waves, but were coming one after another with no rest in between.  I was also angry about that.  What happened to that minute or two rest I was supposed to have in between each horrific, painful, cramp taking over my body?!  

45 minutes later, my doula told the nurse to check me again because either the baby was sunny side-up OR I was progressing very quickly.  Sure enough, just 45 minutes later, I was already at 8 centimeters.  

I crawled in to the birthing tub, my water broke, and it was time to push.  Looking back, I have to laugh because I had brought a cute little sports bra to wear in the tub for modesty's sake.  In the throes of  natural childbirth, decency goes out the window.  I am pretty sure I TORE my hospital gown off and JUMPED in to that tub as much as a 39 week pregnant girl can.  

I was so happy to start pushing because that meant the contractions would feel differently and I was just pushing!  Well let me tell you...the don't call it the ring of fire for nothing.  WOW.  The pain of pushing (for me) was a completely different kind of pain, though no less intense than contractions.  

At 10:33 pm, just four hours after eating a cheeseburger and less than two hours after arriving at the hospital, my slimy, swollen, hairy daughter was born.  (I'm sorry...I'm one of those people who don't find newborns all that beautiful...even my own!)  

In the movies, the mom always frantically and lovingly asks, "Is she okay?  Is she healthy?  Does she have ten fingers and ten toes?!"  I can say with absolute honesty, those words didn't even cross my mind.  The very FIRST thing I said to myself was, "THANK GOD that's over."  Oops.  Sorry Sienna. 

I do remember one touchy-feely, sweet moment though.  When they put her in my arms, she opened her eyes, and stared right in to mine.  I remember the room seemed fuzzier and quieter and life slowed down just in that moment.  And then it was over, and it was out of the tub for me.  I had a few complications down under, having to do with some tearing and birthing my placenta.  Lovely, I know.  

PS: Matt gagged twice during the course of all this.  First, when her head started to come out...he literally had to walk away, and wasn't too impressed with the miracle of birth at that moment.  And then afterwards, someone had casually just left the placenta laying out, which Matt happened to catch a glance of.  Once again, he had to leave the premises and get his gag reflex under control.  Thinking about both of those moments makes me laugh out loud.  

PPS: These are the nice pictures.  I have some pictures of me still in the birthing tub that could probably feature on Ellen's "Awkward Family Photos" segment!

5 Ways To Crawl Out of a Workout Slump

Have you ever been in a workout slump?  Unmotivated?  Uninspired?  

ME TOO!  

As a matter of fact, I've been living here for a few weeks.  My workouts have been sporadic and my effort dismal.  My wide variety of programs remain on my shelf ignored and unused. 

Yes, believe it or not, I do not jump out of bed excited to workout everyday.  Shocking, I know.  So how do I make it through these ruts...these valleys of my fitness journey?  How do you get back to the competitive, motivated, workout-crushing machine that you once were? 

Here are my tips for coming out of your workout slump...

1. Just move. 

Do something.  Anything.  Go for a walk.  Stick the DVD in and do it half-heartedly if you must.  Chase your kids around the park.  Have a dance party in your living room.  Just move. 

2. Do something different.

If you're a gym-goer, purchase a DVD workout series.  If you work out from home, go back to the gym.  If you are a runner, go take a local hip-hop cardio class!  Do something TOTALLY different than you've been doing. 

3. Do something fun.

Go play tennis or basketball or organize a flag football game!  Go roller skating.  Go to one of those trampoline places and see how long you last!  (I hear most people don't last very long!)

4. Create accountability.

Obviously, you can join one of my online accountability groups, but you don't have to!  Tell your best friend that she is going to meet you at the gym everyday for the next two weeks.  Tell your husband, mom, co-workers, social media network to check in with you everyday and ask you if you did you workout!  Find a running buddy or yoga partner.  Create your own accountability!

5. Challenge yourself. 

Give yourself a workout challenge and make sure you reward yourself at the end!  It might be that you are going to workout for 25 of the next 30 days, and after one month, you get to go splurge on a new outfit a Lulu Lemon (that would motivate me)!  Maybe you and your friends do a squat challenge where you build up your repetitions to a certain number.  Perhaps you could sign up for a 5K or even a half-marathon!  Draw out your competitive juices to help get you back on track! 

BONUS TIP:

Remember why you are working out in the first place, write it down, put it somewhere you will see it, and when you don't feel like working out, whip out that reminder, and PRESS PLAY! 

The Comeback Kid

Have you ever gotten off track?  

Have you ever decided to focus on a course, but along the way you get distracted, so you veer off, dabble, and end up more confused than ever?  

Have you ever been confident in your strengths, only to quickly lose that confidence when you start looking at others and what they're doing and how successful they are?

Me too.  

Almost exactly a year ago, I decided to focus on this blog, feeling confident that my writing was going to be the best and most effective way for ME to reach people.  I really enjoy writing, and some even say I'm not too bad at it.  I felt like a blog would give me the opportunity to share my thoughts, and struggles, opinions, and lessons learned in all aspects of my life.  I hoped my blog would help me reach people beyond my circle, make new friendships, and new business contacts.   

Then I started looking around.  I started noticing how this person had a wildly successful youtube channel, and this person seemed to be having almost instantaneous success on a Facebook like page.  

So I dabbled.  And dabbled.  And became more and more confused about who I was, where I wanted my business to go, and what my true mission was.  

After weeks of inner turmoil, unnecessary stress, and soul-searching, I realized that I really just wanted to blog again.  I missed it.  I missed expressing myself through the written word and sharing my vulnerabilities and victories with whoever might be reading.  This blog makes me feel proud.  This blog makes me feel the most ME.  I don't have to pretend when I am blogging.  

So.I'm.back. 

And guess what else?  I have another huge confession to make.  And this one hurts a little.  In a whisper here and a stirring there, the way God does, He spoke to me.  

(I literally just had to swallow my pride and fear before I typed this next part out.)

I haven't been using my platform enough for His purpose and His glory.  Ouch.  But He's right.  I can preach health and fitness all day long...I obviously seem to have plenty to say by the looks of my Facebook page or my last few blog posts.  But what about Him?  In parenthood, in marriage, in career, my greatest passion and commitment should always be Him. 

How can it not be?  How can I have SO MUCH to share about the 21 Day Fix, yet too infrequently, do I share about who HE is and His grace and His blessings?!  

I've been scared.  I've been shy.  I've been too comfortable.  I haven't wanted to step on anyone's toes.  I still cringe as I write this.  Whew.  

And then I had another thought.  Why would God allow me to expand my reach when I am not taking care of the network I already have?  Why would He bless me with more followers, friends, or readers, when I am not sharing Him with those I already  have access to?  

So that's that.  As much as it hurt to realize that truth, I feel more peace than I've felt in weeks.  I have a new confidence and a new purpose.  I feel refreshed and renewed because in the midst of my failings, I've been showered with God's grace. He's giving me another chance because He always gives us another chance.

So I'm back and I'm grateful. 

Fit In Five : Leg Day

Only have five minutes?  I have the perfect workout for those THIGHS today! 

Organized Under Pressure

For just over a year, I have been incredibly blessed to have my husband around.  On May 12, of last year, he came home from playing baseball in Mexico, and made the unbearably difficult decision to retire. 

In the past year, he has taken his time, explored some different opportunities, invested in friendships, networked around town, and most importantly and for what I am most grateful for...he committed to his family. 

He allowed his schedule to be flexible, so that he could spend a LOT of time with me and the children.  He was more than willing to stay home with the kids a few days every week, so that I could not just work at my Beachbody business, but have some fun time for me, as well.  Needless to say, it has been wonderful, and I know I've been spoiled.

Just yesterday, he started his new career in residential lending and I couldn't be happier for him.  And I know the structure and routine will benefit our family in many ways, but I also know, it will not be an easy adjustment for me or the kids.  

All this to say, in expectancy of Matt not being able to help as much, I did something this week, I haven't done in months!  I have two words for you...

MEAL.PREP.

Now some of you probably think that I always meal prep because I eat so healthy blah, blah, blah!  The truth is I don't and I TRY to.  Meal planning and prepping has always intimidated and overwhelmed me.  Lucky for me, I've never been forced to do it (unless we were on a specific diet).  This past year, especially, I have relied on Matt to help me feed the kids and ourselves.  It hasn't all been on me in quite a while.  

But on Sunday I sat down, did my research, found my recipes, went to the store and started cooking!  In the last two days, I have made egg muffins, turkey meatballs, I have steak marinating in the refrigerator, and I whipped up a batch of Shakeology balls.  

I was looking for relatively healthy meals and snacks that I could freeze and pull out when I just needed a quick meal for the kids or myself.  I am really happy about my progress and I hope this  motivation sticks.  

I have to laugh though (and Matt did too) how at the very last minute, I am suddenly inspired  and excited to get organized, plan, and think ahead!  Why does it take so long?  Why is it that we choose the day before guests come in to town to clean out that closet?  

For me, I think my brain went in to fight or flight.  With Matt going back to work, I had two options...run away or get brave and fight back!  

Beachbody Income Update

I was so afraid of what people would think of me. 

I was so worried about protecting my reputation. 

I was so scared that people would look at me and roll their eyes while muttering to themselves…

“We don’t care about your silly workouts!” 

I was terrified of falling on my face and confirming what I already believed…that this just wasn’t going to work for me and I was going fail miserably. 

Despite all of these reasons NOT to become a Beachbody coach, there was this tiny glimmer of hope inside of me that thought…

“But what if?  Why not me?”

And so I became a coach with zero expectations and a whole lot of doubt and fear. 

I started out slow and steady.  I practiced a few behaviors consistently.  I tiptoed out of my comfort zone. 

I started to believe.  I started to dream.  That tiny glimmer of hope grew.

My income, like me, started out slow and steady…until it didn’t anymore.  It has now grown quickly and significantly.*

I’m as shocked as you.  It happened.  It worked.  I am working part time hours; whenever I want; from home.  I didn’t fail. 

I am contributing significantly to our income simply by putting myself out there on social media and doing my best to help others reach their health and fitness goals. 

It has been worth every risk, every step out of my comfort zone, every discomfort, and yes, even every eye roll! 

I am humbled and grateful by these numbers, yet also know they will continue to grow if I stay consistent, stay intentional, and never lose sight of what this is really all about…helping others get healthy and feel confident. 

So…as I promised, here is how my income has grown.**

If you are interested in learning more about this opportunity, please fill out this application, so I can get in touch with you! 

http://daralaporta.com/become-a-beachbody-coach/

*On months 13 and 16, the income statements shown do not quite add up because Matt's coach account is also making money now, so his income makes up the difference between the income statements and the amount I have displayed!  

**Beachbody® does not guarantee any level of success or income from the Beachbody Coach Business Opportunity. Each Coach's income depends on his or her own efforts, diligence, and skill. See our Statement of Independent Coach Earnings for the most recent information on our Coaches' actual incomes.**