Picture-Perfect Marriage

It's no secret that I put myself out there on social media.  I am pretty open and vulnerable whether we are acquaintances, lifelong friends, or you've just come across a post on Facebook.  Honestly, I consider it a gift and a strength that God has given me.  I never thought I would share so much of myself on social media.  I realize it's not for everyone.  

Yes, I started posting more for my Beachbody business, but now I feel like it's part of my ministry.  Yep, that's right...I said that posting on Facebook is my MINISTRY.  Scary, huh?  What has the world come to?  Am I out of my mind?  Who do I think I am?  Do I really think God can use me through FACEBOOK?!  

Yes.I.do. 

Someone recently asked my husband if it bothered him the way I put myself (and him and our marriage) out there.  His response?  "Absolutely not.  I know where I stand in my marriage and with my wife.  I am confident enough in our relationship that what she posts comes as no surprise to me." 

Do you know what I love about Matt's response?  He too knows marriage is hard.  It's no secret.  What I post on social media is not surprising to him.  He knows our struggles because we talk about them...a LOT.  He knows our pressure points because we experience them together.  Anything I vaguely hint at on Facebook has already been talked out, communicated through, and worked out between Matt and I.  If I am vulnerable on Facebook, how much MORE vulnerable do you think I am with my husband?  

Don't get me wrong, I don't air our dirty laundry (nor do I intend to) and I rarely get in to specifics, but I have made no secret about the fact that marriage is hard.  Our marriage is hard.  Isn't all marriage hard?  

I would love to hide behind pictures of romantic date nights and adorable family photos, but that's not the whole truth, is it?  Again, I don't expect everyone to do what I do, but I feel called to make sure people understand that our marriage is not picture perfect.  

And that's what I love about my marriage.  I love that it's not perfect and more importantly, that Matt and I both realize it.  I love that if we were to list the specific struggles we have in our marriage, our lists would look very similar.  Our problems are not a mystery to us.  When we are getting off course, losing track of each other, bickering, we take the time to find the root.  We search each other's hearts and ask "What's really going on here?"

Are those conversations fun?  No.  Are they always done in a calm, patient, loving manner?  No.  Do we always find the answers right away?  No.  Does that mean that specific problem is solved forever?  No.  But the result of those many conversations throughout the weeks, months, and years is that we always get back on track, on course before it's too late. 

So when I post a vulnerable post about the sensitive topic of my marriage, don't doubt for one second that Matt doesn't know EXACTLY what I'm talking about.  He knows.  We've already been there.  We've already done that.  

So why post about that stuff at all?  I have to.  Like I said, I actually do feel called to.  I think talking about the difficult parts of marriage might make you feel normal.  I think it might inspire someone else.  Maybe it will challenge you.  I need you to know that we don't have it all together, but we are TRYING.  With God's help, infinite grace, and perfect example of sacrificial love, Matt and I will continue to strive toward a selfless, beautiful marriage...the kind of marriage Christ desires for us...the kind of marriage that our children will want to exemplify in their own relationships.  

So that's us...far from perfect, but always communicating, always working, never giving up.